After praying the other morning I went to make breakfast and God reminded me of the Cheez-it commercial. When the man comes and ask the cheese has he matured and the cheese answers him with a smart mouth answer, he checks not ready! Then he comes back a few weeks later and the cheese is ready and answers intelligently. God said to me, “This is how I came to you many times and I had to mark you not ready but now you are ready. Many other’s are just like you, they look ready but when their words and actions prove them not ready.
Matthew 23:37 “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the one who kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing.”
Jesus wept over Jerusalem because all the warning and the prophets that came up to deliver them with a word they would not even listen and therefore destroyed themselves when turning a death ear.
I’ll get a little more transparent from personal experience. Mostly out of ignorance I was stubborn and hard-hearten and going through those teenage hormones disobedient. I loved God but had no idea how I was suppose to live for him, so I definitely rode the lukewarm fence most of my life. I was busy looking for love in all the wrong places and not knowing how to accept God’s. I became a teen parent, I dated men, went through the fast party life, thinking I found Mr.Right in all the wrong ways. I was thirsty and thought I was a player of some sort. I would clean up half washed for a while and I had no patience and every time I would break down and repent, I was an addict to my lifestyle. I wanted to live for God and live for Miriam. God does not work that way and I had to learn that through a whole lot of pain. I was praying for one thing and my flesh was dragging me around with all the fancies the world could offer. I would be bored at parties wanting to just go to bed. I’d use men just to satisfy my needs and have no feelings or care for them, all while saying yeah yeah, I love you and know it was lie straight from the devil’s mouth. All while juggling, school, a child and a trying to find a job. I was prideful, I didn’t want my son to grow up with lack but I was lacking big time. I was lacking Jesus and trying to win the approval of people. My mindset had to change; why would you give a child the keys to the Benz expecting them not to crash it. You wouldn’t and God wouldn’t give me my inheritance without training me up first. In August of this year, I got tired of missing out and I KNOW He had so much in store for me. I said Lord, I give in, I am simply tired, trying to fight this world, Satan and You. Whatever, I do not care what it is you want me to do! I will do whatever just teach me your will, way and give me your thoughts. God said give me three months of your time and so I can catch you up for the three years you have missed. This is the third month and when He came to giving me assignments and doing what He had called me to do. I was like, okay. Many say, they want to hear God say, well done when they get to heaven. I want to hear it on earth and have I. Yes! I was in praise and worship about a Sunday or go and I said Lord, I just want to please you and no one else. The benefits are nice but you are the treasure I SEEK. He said, “Well done daughter!” I often ask Him what would He like me to say, do, go, speak! I am making it a habit more each day but I had to learn how to bow my will, way and thoughts to His. I have chaos all around me. My son has been sick, bill collectors have called, I have been sick, but I am beautifully broken. I pray outside very often and my eyes were closed and I saw a treasure room. Jesus was standing in there and He said take anything you want! (Happy dance), tell a women she can have anything she wants and think she won’t take everything. Yeah I walked into the room, took everything I wanted and stood in from of Jesus and said and I’m taking you with me! (I laugh out loud every time I think about it). I can’t make it with out Jesus. I would rather starve, be in thirst, sleep under a tree and walk miles just to find my Jesus, He is the lover of my soul. I love our conversations and the past few days, I’ve been hearing you are ready, daughter! I’m up for it! Where and however He leads me I am going to be able to do it because He said so. I had to choose to mature in Christ or stay a babe! I had to make up my mind, was I going to conquer or be conquered. I have a saying, ‘Wear your Royalty well!’ I had to learn how to be a mature daughter in the Kingdom of God!